Forgiveness: When it Hurts to Forgive


Matthew 18:22 says’ Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.

WHEW! This one is a big one! Don’t worry we are going to get through this one. The reason this is so hard for us all is because it cuts right through us. When we have been hurt, disappointed it leaves wounds, some wounds don’t even recover because the damage is far too great. I don’t want to minimize no one’s feelings or thoughts because forgiveness is not easy.

We all have stories and thoughts about forgiveness some will say I may forgive but I won’t forget, and that is okay you don’t have to forget what was done to you, but we must forgive everyone. When we choose not to forgive did you know that you become that person prisoner? I know you don’t think so but let me explain this, think back to an incident that happen where you did not forgive that person, think about how it made you feel and how if you saw that person it still bothered you?

Those are known as wounds not healed, but the person who did this to you they have moved on with life they have forgotten what they did, maybe they aren’t aware that you are still heart-broken over it. Do you see now how you have become their prisoner?

For most of us we can forgive quickly but depending on the severity of the circumstances most of us don’t forgive to quickly we go through all the emotions of pain and suffering then after we have had several talks in our mind about how we are going to treat this person, now we are able to stop the emotions and move on, so we think we have.

You and I will never walk in complete freedom if we hold on to grudges and unforgiveness. When you forgive it does not mean you are making excuses for their behavior. Forgiveness cleans your heart.

Let me give you some examples of what unforgiveness can and will do to our heart. It will bring hate, anger, malice, resentment, and revenge, this is just the mental part now to our physical bodies, we suffer with our health. Yes, our health is affected by our un- forgiveness. And do you know why? It’s because we bring worrisome and stress and we know what too much stress can do to the body. That is why when we go to our doctors they always ask are you stress in any way?

At the end when we look at what unforgiveness can do to us, is it worth it? I don’t think it is worth it. Yes, you and I have been hurt and you know we will probably be disappointed again but we can’t live as a prisoner to anyone. Jesus tells us to forgive every man all the time, for when we don’t forgive men Jesus won’t forgive us. And don’t you want Jesus to forgive you?

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10 thoughts on “Forgiveness: When it Hurts to Forgive

  1. I have forgiven someone that promised marriage all the time knowing it would never happen. He does not seem to forgive me although I really don’t know what I did or said for him to forgive, but I apologized anyway. I know God is close to the brokenhearted and saves those crushed in spirit. He was the love of my life and I have grieved for 2 years now. I have been broken for sometime now and has affected my well being. It’s something that caused deep scars. Great Article❤

    1. Thank you for your comment. Your time of sorrows has been long over due.

      God loves you and He’s healed you from that painful grieving, it’s time for you to walk in your freedom.

      The enemy gets pleasure in making us feel guilty. Submit to God and resist the devil and he will flee.

      May your relationship with Jesus continues to deepen.

  2. I am glad I found this. Desiray, you are right in everything you said but it can be hard to forgive someone who repeatedly hurts you and you can’t get away from them because they are a family member. How can we cultivate forgiveness for an ongoing situation, and also how can we protect ourselves from their evil?

    1. Family is the hardest but it can be done, with the help of all mighy God.

      With an on going situation you have to let that person know how you love them, but you can’t allow them to hurt you any longer.

      Me and my sisters grew up very close and after our mother died our relationship drew is apart.

      I forgave her and she forgave me but I told her that I will not take her behavior towards me to continue. And so now we don’t talk at all.

      It bothered me at first, I miss my sister, but I know she is on God’s hands. God tells us to forgive He never told us to allow people to take their behavior.

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