Proverbs 14:7 say’s Stay away from a fool, for you will not find knowledge on their lips.
There are some people who we all encounter from time to time who are toxic. This type of person thrives on draining the life out of you. They could be a coworker, a friend and sometimes a family member. And so how do we handle this type of person. First, one needs to understand that no matter what you do you will never be able to make this person happy. Often when we have a close relationship with that person we feel as though we must walk on egg shells, so we tend to be careful as to what we say.
God never intended for you and me to make a person happy. It’s not our job. We can’t validate them only Christ can do that. Below are a few signs of what I call a toxic person who drains the life out of you.
- They are critical
- They are controlling
- They are manipulative
- They speak negatively all the time
- They are constantly taking and never giving
- Their conversation is one sided
- They blame others for everything
As you can see from the list you can probably name a few more. The question now is how do we deal with a person who drains us? The first thing we must do if we are wanting to keep the relationship with them is to set boundaries. When you set the boundaries, you will have to let the person know the reason as to why these boundaries are in place. Often, we set boundaries without letting a person know and then they wonder why we have changed. Secondly, we need to pray for them and pray for us. For if we don’t pray for ourselves, we will end up holding a grudge, or perhaps some bitterness against that person.
People with toxic behavior has a deeper sense of something missing within themselves. They might not even realize that they are draining the life out of you. We all have experienced pain and hurt in our lives and I dare to say that none of us has truly given the Lord all our hurts and pain. Remember toxic people are hurting. That is why we must pray for them but also not to let them steal your joy. It’s not always easy for us to deal with toxic people but it can be done with the help of the Lord.